The caffeine post the other day made me think of something I had heard about several years ago...coffee enemas. This triggered an entire string of thought with me. I wondered if people walked in to the colonic spa and were asked, "regular or decaf" just like at Starbucks? Or how about, do you want room for cream in that? whole, 2% or skim? I found this article:

The use of coffee in enemas for detoxification purposes is well known. It is a common herbalogical remedy that has been suggested by holistic and alternative medicine professionals for many years. Why it works The effects of a coffee enema are different than a saline enema. The most important difference between a saline enema and a coffee enema is the presence of caffeine in the coffee. Caffeine, theophylline and theobromine, combine to stimulate the relaxation of smooth muscles causing dilatation of blood vessels and bile ducts. The effects of having a coffee enema are not the same as drinking coffee. The veins of the anus are very close to the surface of the tissue. The caffeine is therefore absorbed more quickly (and in higher concentration) than it is in when coffee is drunk. Liver benefits Additionally, coffee has a chemical makeup that is stimulative. The enzymes in coffee, known as palmitates, help the liver carry away the toxins in bile acid. The coffee is absorbed into the hemorrhoidal vein, then taken up to the liver by the portal vein. With the bile ducts dilated, bile carries toxins away to the gastro-intestinal tract. Simultaneously, peristaltic activity is encouraged because of the flooding of the lower colon. Thus, when the colon is evacuated, the toxins and bile are carried out of the body. Supplies You will need to buy a re-usable enema kit, available at most pharmacies. They are usually disposable (although they can be cleaned and reused for several months) and they are inexpensive. Distilled water. Organic coffee, any roasting level will do. French Press pot. Preparing the Coffee Bring 8 cups of water to a boil. Grind eight heaping spoonfuls of organic coffee. Put it in a french press pot. Pour the water over the coffee grounds and let it steep then cool for one hour. After this amount of time, the liquid should be about body temperature. If you stick your finger in the water it should be lukewarm, but not hot. Press the coffee grounds to the bottom, then pour the coffee liquid into the enema bag. Directions Follow the directions that accompany the enema kit. Lie on your right side, inject and retain the coffee for 10-20 minutes. I recommend lightly massaging your abdomen from left to right (up the left side, and then left to right just below the navel). Additionally, I recommend changing positions while retaining the coffee. After a few minutes turn over onto your back, a few minutes later switch to your left side before evacuating your bowels. Concerns Many people are concerned that the body will become 'addicted' to the enema. This fear is unfounded. The bowels can continue to function on their own after enemas are discontinued.

Holy Shit! (pun intended)

The caffeine is absorbed more quickly than drinking? Does that mean one day we'll all be doing Starbucks enemas in the morning on the way to work for that "extra pep" to face the day? I'm really glad to hear that the effects of drinking coffee vs. a coffee enema are not the same... what a shock! They recommend using distilled water and organic coffee? I don't even use that for coffee I drink. But, it's good to know that any roast of coffee will do. How about Breakfast Blend for the am enema and French Roast for the afternoon pick-me-up colonic? And for any of you out there who are concerned about addiction to caffeine, the enema is the way to go as "Many people are concerned that the body will become 'addicted' to the enema. This fear is unfounded. The bowels can continue to function on their own after enemas are discontinued. "

Suggested Brands For Enema Use:

Starbutts, G.I.valia, Tushy's, Seattle's Butts Coffee, 100% mountain grown Colon-bean coffee Laxwell House and last, but not least, Innuendo ( the new Italian import brand)

I'm pleased to tell you that s.a.Wilson's Therapy Blend Coffee---supplies organic coffee that has been specifically blended and roasted for enema use.

What the hell does that mean? What is so different about this coffee from the regular crap you get at the local coffee shop? Sing along with me now.... The Best Part of Waking Up.. Is Folgers In Your Butt...