As I had written last night, Cache is not a movie for the masses, not American's anyhow. I'm afraid that our culture has created an audience that cannot wait and must have constant stimulation. We don't want detail shots, we don't want any mystery and above all, we don't want to to be forced to think too much. This movie possess all of those quantities, and more. Part of my problem is that the film's audio is in French. It's sub-titled, of course. The difficulty there is, I speak French, so I'm stuck trying to translate in my head. I can't do it quickly enough. So I go back and forth, reading the subtitles, translating and trying to catch all the subtleties of the film. Not easy! I think that's why I missed a few things, and most likely have to view the movie again. It was intriguing, yet frustrating...There were layers upon layers. It left me scratching my head and yet, at the same time it made me come back and re-examine some uncomfortable topics. It draws on many contemporary fears, without coming out and actually mentioning them. I like that sort of thing. I don't need everything thrown in my face to "get it." I find that being subtle and utilizing innuendo builds the suspense and engages the mind far more than anything else. There's also a sharp political bite there, that may be easy to miss. The is a use of a metaphorical mechanism by which to pin the tail of colonial guilt on Georges and the rest of us smug bourgeois folk. I think the conclusion (or lack thereof) of the film is what most will find most unsettling. It's not all wrapped up in a neat little package for us. There's not trite and contrived conclusion that we've grown so accustomed to.

Sexsomnia: Not as funny as it sounds Sexsomnia is one of those words that's both titillating and disarming to hear. It's the name for a condition in which someone has a sexual experience while asleep, sort of like how people walk or talk in their sleep. It spawns jokes from the people it affects and from the people who are lucky enough not to have to deal with this sleep disorder. I have never heard of such a thing in my life. Now, I talk in my sleep, and I've been known to sleep walk- but never this. If I hadn't come across this on my little cutie, Anderson Cooper's blog- I'd dimiss it as internet rubbish... I need to go to sleep now- no sexsomnia for me tonight, thanks!

I'm just too damned tired to write about Cache tonight. Needless to say, B was annoyed that made her sit through it. She actually nodded off once or twice. It' not a film for most American's, I'll say that much tonight...

I went to Maggiano's today for lunch with B and another friend. I asked the waitress to see the wine list. She pointed to the wines by the glass on the lunch menu. I told her, no, I want the wine list, you know- by the bottle. Sheesh- is there something wrong with drinking a bottle of wine at lunchtime? It was a late lunch after all. It wasn't like I was drinking the entire thing on my own. I should have had a European waiter. They'd respect the day time drinking. I like that in a person! I'm finally going to see the movie Cache...I've been wanting to see it since it came in to town.

Top 5 Songs that make you feel warm. (Interpret that any way you like. Personally I'd like to feel warm because it's not been very springlike in my neck of the woods)

1. Boys of Summer- Don Henley
2. Margaritaville- Jimmy Buffett
3. Boys of Summer- Don Henley
4. Hot in Herre- Nelly
5. Saturday in the Park- Chicago

and as a bonus: Good Vibrations- The Beach Boys

1) Of the various cultures, ethnicities or nationalities you belong to, which most strongly do you consider yourself? Danish, as that was the strongest influence on me... My grandfather was born and raised there and I was close to him as I was growing up. 2) Is there a culture you cannot claim heritage from but which you feel quite close to? No. 3) What's one language you wish you knew fluently? I'm sure it would be helpful if I knew more Spanish. 4) If you could move anywhere in the world and be guaranteed a job, etc., where would you go? Kona, Hawaii...but it would be a bummer to have to have a job! 5) If you had a time machine, and could witness any one event without altering or disturbing it, what would you want to see? Hmmm...I have too many to narrow it down to just one.

In honor of Bush's visit to Indianapolis today....

1. At what age did you lose your virginity? I'm still a virgin....ha ha... 2. What is the biggest age difference that you can tolerate between you and your own partner? I've dated someone about 11 years older than I was...For the most part, I date people my age or older. 3. At what age did you start feeling like a true adult? I'm still waiting! No, wait- I don't want to grow up. 4. Do you believe that men and women must dress their age? Hey, dress however you want to... 5. Is there such a thing as being "too young for love"? Yes I do. I know I thought I was in love when I was young, but I wasn't...

Appetizer How would you describe your personal comfort zone? Hey, I'm flexible... Soup What is your favorite tree? I love trees, I Iove taking photos of them too...my favorite is a weeping willow tree. Salad List 3 foods you'd like to include in your dinner plans for tonight. Dinner? Hmm..I had a late lunch of a spinach salad and a split of a bottle of pinot noir. I'm not sure what I'm going to eat before I go to the movies. Main Course What is the best advice you've ever been given, but didn't heed? Don't date her! Dessert On a scale of 1-10 (10 being highest), how much attention do you feel comfortable receiving from others? 8- I'm used to a fair amount of attention, but you aren't going to find out anything that I don't want you to.

Appetizer How would you describe your personal comfort zone? Hey, I'm flexible... Soup What is your favorite tree? I love trees, I Iove taking photos of them too...my favorite is a weeping willow tree. Salad List 3 foods you'd like to include in your dinner plans for tonight. Dinner? Hmm..I had a late lunch of a spinach salad and a split of a bottle of pinot noir. I'm not sure what I'm going to eat before I go to the movies. Main Course What is the best advice you've ever been given, but didn't heed? Don't date her! Dessert On a scale of 1-10 (10 being highest), how much attention do you feel comfortable receiving from others? 8- I'm used to a fair amount of attention, but you aren't going to find out anything that I don't want you to.

1. When is the last time you became unraveled? Unraveled as in pissed-off? Last weekend when B and I were in Pottery Barn. She challenged me on moving the bookcase (it's huge) in the home office. Don't ever tell me I'm incapable of doing something! 2. What's the longest trip you've taken? To Venezuela. 3. Who is the biggest distraction in your life? Who? As in a person? I guess my son as I fret over him... 4. Do people notice you when you walk into a room? Most of the time, yes. 5. Describe the last time you disappointed someone: Hmm...I try not to disappoint, but I'm only human...or so I am told.

FOUR FOR FRIDAY - THE PRIVACY EDITION Q1 - Lost Data: Do you think that a company--regardless of its size or scope--should be fined or penalized for losing its employees' or customers' financial data? I'm a forgiving soul- so no... Q2 - Searching For Data: Do you think search engines like Ask's, Google's, and Yahoo's be required to give the U.S. Department of Justice data on users' searches? Absolutely not. Q3 - Shredding Data: Do you use a shredder either at home or work? I use one at both. Q4 - Sharing Your Data: When you turn to a professional tax preparer to complete your state or federal income tax filings, you trust that person or the company they work for with your most guarded and personal financial information. But what if the tax preparer or the company they work for was allowed to sell your information to data miners and telemarketers, as well as to sister firms associated with the tax preparation company. It could happen if a new IRS proposal is approved. According to an IRS statement, the heart of the proposed regulation focuses on "...the right of taxpayers to control their own tax return information." In other words, in order for a tax preparer to sell your information, you would first have to give your consent. The IRS says that's a good thing because it empowers taxpayers, while critics like the ACLU fear that unscrupulous preparers could dupe some of us. How do you feel about this? Should tax preparers be allowed to sell our personal information, and/or should the IRS even make this an option in the first place? Don't sell my personal infromation, I will get pissed off. But I don't allow anyone else to do my taxes either. I am smart enough to figure it out myself...

1. What is your favorite time of year? Summer, spring, whenever it is warm.. 2. What is it about your favorite season that, well, make it your favorite season? I;m not freezing my ass off, and I can be outside. 3. What is your least favorite time of year? Winter, I hate to be cold, I hate wearing a coat, I hate wearing all those clothes... 4. Do you do anything to celebrate or recognize the changing of the seasons? Just count the days until spring starts and winter is over. 5. What's your favorite thing to do outside? Eat, drink and be merry...

Place an X by all the things you've done. This is for your entire life:> ( x) Smoked a cigarette (x) Drank so much you threw up ( ) Crashed a friend's car ( ) Stolen a car (x) Been in love ( ) Been dumped. () Shoplifted ( ) Been laid off/fired (x) Quit your job ( )Been in a fist fight ( x) Snuck out of your parent's house ( ) Had feelings for someone who didn't have themback ( ) Been arrested ( ) Gone on a blind date (x) Lied to a friend (x) Skipped school ( x) Seen someone die (x ) Been to Canada (x ) Been to Mexico (x) Been on a plane (x) Been lost ( x) Been on the opposite side of the country. (x) Swam in the ocean (x)Felt like dying (x) Cried yourself to sleep ( ) Played cops and robbers (x) Recently colored (x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't (many a time!) (x ) Made prank phone calls ( ) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose ( x) Caught a snowflake on your tongue (x ) Danced in the rain (x) Written a letter to Santa Claus (x) Been kissed under the mistletoe ( xc) Watched the sun rise with someone you care about (x) Blown bubbles (x ) Made a bonfire on the beach ( ) Crashed a party (x) Gone roller-skating (x) Ice-skating 1. Any Children -Just one 2. Any pet's - My pup- the great Gastby 3. Any nicknames? Li-Li, La-La, and rarely Liza 4. Mother's name? Jane 5. What is your favorite drink? wine 6. Tattoos? one new one 7. Body piercing? Just ears 8. Do you love your job? I should... 9. Birthplace: I'm a Hoosier by birth only... 10. Favorite vacation spot? someplace that has the ocean. 11. Ever been to Africa? No , but I'd like to go. 12. Ever steal any traffic signs? No, but I've tried to with some friends. 13. Ever been in a car accident? Not with me driving. 14. A, B, C, D, DD cup size? C 15. 2 Door or 4 Door? 4 doork, I've got a kid and an SUV. 16. Salad dressing? Newman's Sesame something or other.... 17. Favorite pie? cherry or peach or strawberry.... 18. Favorite Number? 13 has always been lucky for me since I was a kid. 19. Favorite movie? Out of Africa 20. Favorite Holiday? Any one I get off of work for... 21. Favorite food? Italian 22. Favorite day of the week? Saturday 23. Favorite brand of body soap? B&BW 24. Favorite TV show? CSI 25. Toothpaste? I have more than one kind 26. Favorite smell - too many to list... 27. What do you do to relax? drink wine! 28. Message to your friends reading this? Nothing. 29. How do you see yourself in 10 years? Old! 30. What do you do when you are bored? I'm rarely, if ever bored- I'm highly self-entertaining, luckily for me! 31. What do you enjoy receiving? I'm not saying!lol...just stick your mind in the gutter 32. What time is it now? 4:18 pm

Take a look at the picture first... So, what did you see? Now proceed and read below to find an explanation of what you really saw. I'm sure you will find this very interesting.

Research has shown that young children cannot identify the intimate couple because they do not have prior memory associated with such scenario. What they will see are the nine dolphins. Additional note: This is a test to determine if you already have a corrupted mind. If it's hard for you to find the dolphins within 3 seconds, your mind is indeed corrupted.

Well....I still can't find the dolphins!

I'm cyber gifting you this macro lens...it's fantastic!

2. Write 3 words that describe me on paper and take a picture of it.

Happy Birthday! 3. A self portrait of you doing a dorky face in the mirror.

This was as dorky as I could muster up last night as I was really, really tired! If you can't tell, I'm sticking my tongue out. Luckily for me, my big honking camera hides most of my goofy face.

As I don't like to have my own picture taken, I instead turn the camera on others. I had my camera with me this morning on the way to school. I snapped this shot of the Ianizer when he wasn't aware I was doing so. We were right by his school and he was obviously already deep in thought, getting ready for the day. Unfortunately, his glasses obscure his gorgeous brown eyes. But then again, what 13-year-old boy wants to have gorgeous eyes? I used a editing filter to make the photo sepia tone so you can't tell, but his hair is still wet. I hate that he leaves the house with wet hair, I'd never do that myself. I'd rather blow up my hair dryer trying to get it dry in reasonable amount of time....  

I had an interesting, almost surreal day. My plans ended up changing from what I originally thought I'd be doing today. Hey, that happens... I was able to get in with my hairstylist today. He's a sweetheart. I've been going to him for a few years now, so of course, he knows every detail of my personal life! While he was working on me, one of the other stylists called him over. Her client, a man (of course) asked Terry (my hair guy) who I was. He said I was "hot." Ugh! Terry took that opportunity to let the man in on the fact that he (Terry) and I both play for the "pink team", i.e - I'm gay and so is he. The guy said that he didn't care, I was still hot. Whatever! After my haircut, I decided to stop at 21st Smendment Liquor Store to stock up on some wine. I ended up spending about an hour there. The owner is a huge wine buff and has thousands of wines in stock. I told him what I liked and he had tons of suggestions. We just had an all-out discussion about a variety of topics. My love for wine had him saying that if he didn't have a wife, he would want to marry me. Though he did admit he was old enough to be my father! He was cracking me up, which is always a good thing with me. He even talked me in to sampling 2 different Rose wines. I have such a negative connotation in my mind when I think of Rose. But these were neither cheap, nor horrible. He told me they go well with salads, which is something that I eat a lot of. So, I may actually buy a bottle. Just not today. I did drink two glasses of the stuff, so it can't be half bad. I find it is a good thing to go out durning the day when "regular" people are at work. You get much better service...

Booking Through Thursday

Today's questions were suggested by Christine.

1. How do you decide to read a book by an author you haven't read before? I get book recommendations from friends, on-line resources, and magazine references.
2. What sort of recommendations count most highly in making that decision? If someone I know has read the book, and it's someone I trust, as far as taste goes in books...

It was really cold out the other morning...I knew it was, without even checking the temperature because Gastby wanted in all on her own free will. She never wants to come inside. I decided to comemerate the event by taking this photo. In return for making her wait outside, she snotted up my french doors.  

These are the words added to the photo and they are from a song written by my friend Morgan, not me. She kindly gave me permission to use them for this purpose.
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 License.

::New Car Smell:: Onesome- New: What's new in your life? New car, new house, new job or new person, or even just a new toy you bought for yourself? Nothing much new, how boring! I love new things... The last new thing I bought was an adorable pair of shoes as I wanted something to make me think spring. Twosome- Car: What kind of car do you drive? What kind of car would you like to drive if you could? I drive a Honda Pilot EX. I'm not sure what car I'd drive. Most likely, I want different cars for different moods. A Porsche Boxter for speeding around and A Lexus GX470 for carrying my bikes and other outdoorsy things. Threesome- Scent: Scents are great at bringing back memories. Is there a scent that any time you smell it you flash back to something in your past? For me, scent is the strongest memory trigger that there is. I have some unusal scents as memory triggers. I enjoy the smell of fresh blacktop asphalt- I think it reminds me of hot summer days when I was a kid. The smell of gasoline, especially diesel reminds me of the day that I first came to California. I had to go pick up my car at the port of Long Beach. It was incredible what a huge port it is...with a long line of gantry cranes pulling those huge containers off of massive ships. The scent of gardenias reminds me of the time I lived in Hawaii and had them growing outside my window.

Da Vinci Code Have you read The Da Vinci Code? Are you looking forward to the movie coming out? I did read the novel when it first came out. I enjoyed it, as I love a good, intelligent and challenging mystery. I take the novel as a work of fiction and am not upset or offended by the book. I'm appreciative of the obvious creativity, attention to detail and research done by Dan Brown to write this book. I am looking forward to the movie, as I love Tom Hanks. I hope I'm not disappointed by the film. That frequently happens to me when I see a film when I have read the corresponding book first.

QOTD

I took Ian to the bookstore the other night- he was running out of reading material. We decieded to go to the cafe- I wanted a chai to drink and he wanted a snack. So we sat down together with our goodies and something made me think of Lent. As he goes to Catholic school and his father is a (sort of) Catholic, I asked him if he gave up anything for Lent. All during this conversation, he's shoveling in the triple chocolate brownie I'd bought for him. It was a decadent dessert, with chocolate sauce and chocolate shavings on top. He took another bite, then answered me- yes, mom- I gave up chocolate! Excuse me? What am I going to do with him? I suppose I should have asked him what he gave up for Lent at the beginning of Lent. I'm just not used to thinking about that kind of thing. I grew up Methodist and we didn't give up anything for Lent. I think that if he says he going to give up something, he should. Otherwise, just don't say you are going to do it, then not do it. To me, that's worse than not giving up anything at all....

(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸A Lizzie Quizzie!¸.•'´¯)¸.• 1. Do you own a passport? yes 2. Have you ever been in an earthquake? Tornado? Flood? yes to earthquake and tornado, no to flood. 3. Do you have to pay taxes this year, or do you get a refund? I get a nice fat refund. It pays to have a dependent! 4. On a scale from 1-10 (10 being best), how thoughtful are you towards others? 8 or 9 5. What is your favorite kind of jelly? Have you ever made your own? My mom's home made strawberry jam- it's addictive. 6. Do you ever play April Fool's Day Jokes? I've been known to... 7. How tall are you? 5'8" and the shortest of my sibs. How unfair! 8. What is your favorite type of ethnic food? Italian...I like Thai too but there isn't a good one in town. 9. Do you have an antenna ball?? Not on your life. 10. A/an __________ a day keeps the __________ away. glass of wine / insanity

Are you more... 01) A harsher critic of others or a harsher critic of yourself? Myself, most definitely. I am probably too forgiving and easy on others, for the most part. 02) One who thinks stealing is the bigger sin or one who thinks lying is the bigger sin? Stealing. 03) Fond of crayons for colouring or fond of paint for colouring? I will admit to liking both. I have my own big box of crayons and a grown-up coloring book too. 04) Someone who thinks they have all the tools they could need or someone who thinks you barely have the minimum number of tools to get by? Are we talking real,actual tools- like the kind you buy at Lowes? Good God, I am not very handy in that department. 05) McDonald's or Burger King? Ewww, neither. 06) Obsessive compulsive or whatever happens, happens? OCD all the way, baby. But not about everything, just my certain things. 07) One who enjoys the company of small children (playing with blocks) or one who enjoys the company of senior citizens (playing bridge)? I like little kids, especially if I get to send them home with their mommy at the end of the fun time. 08) Someone who will vacuum-seal food before putting it in the freezer or someone who will just put it in the freezer? Oh no- this is where I have to admit that I have a vacuum sealer and I love it. I have a special canister for my coffee that I can re-seal every day. Just a part of my OCD! 09) More proud of your belches or more proud of your flatulence? neither. Okay, maybe belches on the rare occasion that I drink a beer. 10) Possessed of a soothing voice or possessed or an order-barking voice? I can do either one.

Wednesday Mind Hump Today is International Goof-off Day! 1. What's your favorite way to goof off? Reading, writing, blogging (of course!) adding to my ITunes or tinkering with digital photos are all things to do if I’m stuck inside. If it’s nice out (which it hasn’t been lately) I’d like to hit the trail, or the water or whatever. I prefer to shoot photos outside for the most part, so I could do that too. 2. How much goofing off do you do on an average day? On average, I don’t have that much time, as my days are relatively full. I try to sneak some in here and there or stay up later than I should to fit it in. 3. If you got paid to blog, how would you goof off and not do your job? Well, I’d have to be sitting at my computer to blog and during the summer I want to be outside and on the go.

Would you rather: be an evil genius OR a super-spy? An Evil Super Spy! be addicted to eating raw eggs OR sticks of butter? Sticks of butter- my son used to love to eat those pats of butter they give you in restaurnats. punch hulk hogan in the face OR throw a rock at george bush? Bush, Baby, Bush! have bionic eyes OR one bionic arm? Does having bionic eyes allow you to have x-ray vision too? I was trying to explain "The Six Million Dollar Man" to my son the other day and he said it sounded cheesy!

I'm feeling a little springy... So the usual format if you will, Spring and spring related words are the theme. Name three songs with the related words in the title. "Silent Spring"- Massive Attack "Silver Springs"- Fleetwood Mac "Southland In The Springtime"- Indigo Girls and as a bonus: "These Are the Days"- 10,000 Maniacs

These are the days you'll remember. When May is rushing over you with desire to be part of the miracles you see in every hour. You'll know it's true that you are blessed and lucky. It's true that you are touched by something that will grow and bloom in you.

Name three albums with the related words in their name. "Winter Into Spring"- Geroge Winston "Spring Fever"- Chuck Mangione

1) Have you ever disturbed other people by making excessive noise while having sex? Well, it isn't like I've gone around knocking on my neighbors doors asking if I've disturbed them. But I may have and not been told that I'd done so. 2) What is the most romantic thing you have ever done or said?? I have no earthly idea. 3) Have you ever licked or sucked on someone else's feet and/or toes? Oh God, I hate feet. I think I've explained why in a previous post. So the answer is NO! 4) On a scale of 1-10, how much does music mean to you in your daily life? I have music around me constantly so I'd say 8.5 5) Have you ever fallen asleep or passed out during sex? No, of course not. Bonus (as in "optional"): Have you ever given or received a hickey on your upper inner thigh? Anywhere? Does a bite mark count? I'm fair-skinned and bruise very easily.

When I was listening to the "Covering" story on NPR today- one thing the author said struck me... He mentioned association, or "how much you choose gay people as your fellow travelers, your lovers, your friends, your colleagues, etc." Okay, if I am gay, and you are my lover, then- by default are you gay too? I don't buy into that "I'm not a lesbian, I just like to sleep with other women" thing. Like in Tony Kushner's "Angels In America"- Al Pacino's character, Roy Cohn, says he is not a homosexual: Roy Cohn: AIDS. Homosexual. Gay. Lesbian. You think these are names that tell you who a person sleeps with, but they don't tell you that. Henry: No? Roy Cohn: No. Like all labels they tell you one thing, and one thing only: Where does an individual so identified fit into the food chain, the pecking order? Not ideology or sexual taste, but something much simpler: clout. Not who I fuck or who fucks me, but who will come to the phone when I call, who owes me favors. This is what a label refers to. Now to someone who does not understand this, a homosexual is what I am because I have sex with men, but really this is wrong. A homosexual is somebody who, in 15 years of trying cannot get a pissant anti-discrimination bill through the city council. A homosexual is somebody who knows nobody and who nobody knows. Who has zero clout. Does this sound like me Henry? Roy Cohn: I have sex with men. But unlike nearly every other man of whom this is true, I bring the guy I'm screwing to the White House and President Reagan smiles at us and shakes his hand. this quote from the movie has nothing to do with this, but it's funny, so I'll share anyhow Louis Ironson: Well, oh boy. A gay Republican. Joe Pitt: Excuse me? Louis Ironson: Nothing. Joe Pitt: Oh, I'm not... No, forget it. Louis Ironson: Not... Republican? Not Republican? Joe Pitt: What? Louis Ironson: What. Joe Pitt: Not gay. I'm not gay. Louis Ironson: Oh. Sorry. It's just that sometimes you can tell by the way a person sounds. I mean, you sound... Joe Pitt: No, I don't. Like what? Louis Ironson: Like a Republican. Joe Pitt: Do I sound like a...? Louis Ironson: What? Like a Republican? Or do I? Joe Pitt: Do you what? Louis Ironson: Sound like a... Joe Pitt: Yeah. Like a... I'm confused. Secondly, I don't pick my friends based on their sexual orientation. Way too discriminatory for me. Oddly enough, more of my friends happen to be straight women. I'm not a good fag-hag, so I don't have a lot of gay male friends. Although, as I've said before, I love the cologne they choose. I'm not friends with straight men, if I wanted to hang out with them I'd just go ahead and date them and get it over with. So they are out... Now being friends with lesbians can be a complicated thing. If you are friends with a lesbian with a girlfriend, you have to be sure that said girlfriend knows that you don't want to date your friend (never a good idea!) and if you are friends with a single lesbian, you have to be sure that she knows that you don't want to date her (unless you do, which is a entirely different thing.) Being friends with straight women has its own set of interesting factors. If said straight woman has a boyfriend/husband, then you have to make sure the s.o. (significant other) knows that: 1. You aren't interested in his woman. 2. You aren't interested in his woman AND him. As in, file away your sick little fantasy, there are not going to be any menage a trois going down. Also, straight women need to understand that lesbians do not find all women attractive. Do you straight women find all men attractive? No, I didn't think so. So stop flattering yourself! It's my personal policy to never be truly interested in a "straight woman"---bad, bad, bad idea! No toaster oven for me, thanks- I'm not recruiting! If you don't know what that means... In 1997, when Ellen DeGeneres' character "Ellen Morgan" on the ABC sitcom "Ellen" discovers that she is a lesbian... "There's a moment in the first half hour of the show in which Laura Dern's character, Susan, dealing with Ellen in full-blown homosexual panic [ after rejecting the advances of a man on a date, and Susan's making a pass at Ellen, who realizes to her dismay that the idea seems much more appealing to her than the man did --] cracks a joke about her failure to "recruit" Ellen for the lesbian cause. "Damn," she says, as the laugh-track explodes, "just one more and I would have gotten that toaster oven!" "Is that gay humor?" Ellen asks, "`cause I don't get it. That's how un-gay I am." Later in the episode, Ellen tells Susan that she "got the joke" just before she comes out, and the end of the episode features a cameo of Melissa Etheridge signing Ellen up as a lesbian and giving Susan the longed-for toaster oven. So that's what the "toaster oven" thing is about. It's a joke about the mistaken idea that every queer person in the world has subscribed to a "homosexual agenda" that includes recruiting as many people to homosexuality as possible, and that this invidious campaign is so organized that there's actually a catalog from which you can select incentive awards. A catalog??? Damn, I'd just go for the new toaster oven! Mine died and I made the horrible mistake of buying a regular Cuisinart toaster. I hate it.... I want my toaster oven back. I loved that damn thing. OK, maybe I need to re-consider my "no-recruiting" stance. Especially if there's this catalog thing I never knew about! The more I recruit, the better stuff I'd get???? Just like those old Betty Crocker catalogs where you had to collect points off of products you'd buy and then turn them in for items you'd pick from their catalog.... Like Green Stamps, if you are old enough to remember that. I'm cracking myself up tonight. Must mean it's time to go to bed, I'm getting goofy.

ENFP - The Champion Your Type is 60% Extroverted, 12% Observant, 43% Logical and 37% Structured

Your type is known as the Champion type, which is part of the larger group called idealists. Nothing occurs that does not have some deep and ethical significance in your eyes. You see life as an exciting drama. You are very charismatic, yet tend to be too harsh on yourself for not being as genuine as you think you should be. 3% of the population shares your type. As a romantic partner, you need to talk about what is going on in your life. You are a strong supporter for your partner's efforts to grow and change and be happy. You need to feel that same support from your partner. Expressive, optimistic, and curious, you are eager to enjoy new experiences with your partner, whom you wish to be your confidant and soul mate, as well as play mate. You are uncomfortable sharing negative emotion, though, and tend to withdraw from confrontation and process your feelings privately. You feel most loved when your partner appreciates your creativity, accepts your uniqueness, and sees you as the compassionate person you are. You need to hear your partner tell you how much you mean to them and would love if they did thoughtful spontaneous things to demonstrate it. Your group summary: idealists (NF) Your type summary: ENFP vincex's shorter version of this test. My longer version of this same test. The real deal.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 50% on outgoing You scored higher than 18% on observant You scored higher than 68% on logical You scored higher than 36% on structured

Link: The Quick and Dirty Personality Test written by unpretentious2 on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

The Vampire Novel Hmm, very interesting! You scored 144!

People are addicted to you, as you make such entertaining and sexy reading material. You get people’s imaginations flowing and make for the type of book people want to read more than once. Cults have been inspired by the likes of you.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 28% on bookpoints

Link: The What Kind Of Book Are You Test written by saucygirl on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

"It is a fact that persons who are ready to admit possession of a stigma (in many cases because it is known about or immediately apparent) may nonetheless make a great effort to keep the stigma from looming large. . . . this process will be referred to as covering." - Erving Goffman, Stigma: Notes on the Management of Spoiled Identity (1963).

An Excerpt from Covering by Kenji Yoshino:

Everyone covers. To cover is to tone down a disfavored identity to fit into the mainstream. In our increasingly diverse society, all of us are outside the mainstream in some way. Nonetheless, being deemed mainstream is still often a necessity of social life. For this reason, every reader of this book has covered, whether consciously or not, and sometimes at significant personal cost. In a supposedly enlightened age, the persistence of the covering demand presents a puzzle. Today, race, national origin, sex, religion, and disability are all protected by federal civil rights laws. An increasing number of states and localities include sexual orientation in civil rights laws as well. Albeit with varying degrees of conviction, Americans have come to a consensus that people should not be penalized for being different along these dimensions. That consensus, however, does not protect individuals against demands that they mute those differences. We need an explanation for why the civil rights revolution has stalled on covering. Covering is a hidden assault on our civil rights. We have not been able to see it as such because it has swaddled itself in the benign language of assimilation. But if we look closely, we will see that covering is the way many groups are being held back today. The reason racial minorities are pressured to "act white" is because of white supremacy. The reason women are told to downplay their child-care responsibilities in the workplace is because of patriarchy. And the reason gays are asked not to "flaunt" is because of homophobia. So long as such covering demands persist, American civil rights will not have completed its work. Unfortunately, the law has yet to perceive covering as a threat. Contemporary civil rights law generally only protects traits that individuals cannot change, like their skin color, chromosomes, or innate sexual orientations. This means that current law will not protect us against most covering demands, because such demands direct themselves at the behavioral aspects of our personhood. This is so despite the fact that covering imposes costs on us all.

I caught the tail end of the interview with author Kenji Yoshino this afternoon on NPR. If you'd like to hear it for yourself you can go here. Kenji Yoshino is professor of law and deputy dean for intellectual life at Yale Law School. He was educated at Harvard, Oxford, and Yale Law School.

Gay Covering

Unlike most racial minorities, women, and individuals with disabilities, most gays have (in fact or in the imagination of others) a panoply of options for assimilation. These forms of assimilation include conversion, passing, and covering. The history of gay rights can be retold as a history of resistance to these three kinds for assimilation.

Through the middle of the twentieth century, gays were routinely asked to convert to heterosexuality, whether through lobotomies, electroshock therapy, or psychoanalysis. As the gay rights movement gained strength, the demand to convert gradually ceded to the demand to pass. This shift can be seen in the military’s adoption in 1993 of the “Don’t ask, don’t tell” policy, under which gays are permitted to serve so long as they agree to pass. Finally, at millennium’s turn, the demand to pass is giving way to the demand to cover -- gays are increasingly permitted to be gay and out so long as they do not “flaunt” their identities. The contemporary resistance to gay marriage can be understood as a covering demand: Fine, be gay, but don’t shove it in our faces.

Gays routinely cover along all four axes: appearance (“acting straight”); affiliation (not making references to gay culture); activism (avoiding the charge of being militant or strident about gay rights); and association (eschewing public displays of same-sex affection).

Notable instances in which gays who resisted the demand to cover lost their cases include Shahar v. Bowers (1997), in which a lesbian attorney was fired for engaging in a private same-sex commitment ceremony, and Lundin v. Lundin (1990), in which a gay couple was denied custody of a child because they engaged in displays of affection.

Spencer Tunick is a Brooklyn-born photographer. He's best known for documenting large groups of nude people in public places. He's currently shooting in Caracas, Venezuela. You can read a story about that here. The thing I find the most amusing is that he's been arrested multiple times while shooting in the United States. It's just another illustration as to why we're viewed by many as such a prudish nation. If were such prudes, why do we have such an astronomical rate of abortions and sexually active teens? It's such a contradiction. We're a repressed nation that acts out instead of dealing properly with our emotions. In the United States, women strive to achieve a bodily perfection yet are often uncomfortable in situations requiring nudity. The culture in the United States instills a high degree of body shame when compared to many other countries, yet it is certainly nothing like the repression of women in many Islamic countries. Although this conditioning has its origin in the philosophy of the Puritans, it is today expressed as civil law which applies to all citizens. This is not without negative consequences. Some people have been taught such a high degree of body shame that for them going for a necessary medical exam,such as a pap test or breast exam, is traumatic and some women avoid these life saving measures altogether. Our society's mandate that we view our bodies with shame and disgrace has a negative impact upon our self image. Dr. Alayne Yates, M.D., Professor of Psychiatry at the University of Arizona, has shown that in cultures where nudity is common, children mature to be less critical of bodies in general. Additionally-the anthropologist Margaret Mead said that the acceptance of nudity "would ultimately lead to a decrease in neurosis and certain types of crime." Overall,there are definite individual and societal benefits to the acceptance of our bodies. Social conditioning and laws which perpetuate a sense of body shame and disgrace have very negative consequences-especially to women. Europeans generally do not see what the big deal is with nudity. They are not shocked by the exposure of the human body, but we are. Personally, I think their attitude toward the human body is much better then our American attitude. They simply don't associate all nudity with sexuality and aren't embarrassed by their bodies. While nudity can be a part of sexuality/sensuality- it's certainly not the end-all, be-all...I think we tend to forget that the physical aspect is just a single facet of it, and the mental and spiritual side of sensuality tends to suffer. Now, when you have all 3 going on, and in balance, you've hit the jackpot- the transcendent blissful trinity.